The Best Advice My Therapist Ever Gave Me

Groundbreaking yet basic advice that might change my life

I’m not new to therapy. While I’ve taken breaks, I’ve always been a big believer in its benefits. Over the last several years, it’s become an especially important part of my life as a woman with anxiety and ADHD.

I’ve worked with a few different therapists throughout my life. One helped me navigate issues with my mom, and I loved working with her. But then the pandemic hit, and my toddler was diagnosed with cancer. I shifted gears and started seeing a family psychologist to support us in a different way. I stayed with her until she transitioned her practice to focus on intensive, weekly therapy, which was more than I needed.

It’s so hard to find someone new, and after a year without therapy, I started asking friends for recommendations. Two close friends see the same therapist, and both recommended her. I’ve been seeing her weekly since early September, and it’s been amazing. And in that time, I’ve felt ready to revisit my relationship with my mom, and that fact that I haven’t spoken to her in 3 years.

Recently, my therapist said something that felt like a huge aha moment—one I can’t believe no one has ever told me before. Or maybe they did, and I just wasn’t ready to hear it.

photo by Katie Kett